1 dried up?

The end of April fast approaches and I find myself having written only 5 (six if you include this one) posts.  My initial absence was anxiety related; I needed to purge the irrational thoughts that began when I got my first follower and when I began participating in different blogging communities.  Now I find myself at a standstill, uncertain how to get back to where I began.  My state of being now is lost, wordless, depressed, lacking in motivation, uncaring....  I want to find my way back, I'm just not certain I'm ready or that it's possible.  It's not unusual for me to go through spurts of not writing.  I can look back over my years and find large gaps; either I became to busy or lost inspiration or found inspiration in other endeavors.  I think it is something about this particular medium that makes me itch to not let time pass by so unnoticed as I have in the past when using paper and pencil.  I don't know...  Maybe I need to borrow from the logical part of my brain and revamp my blogging into a more structured (prescribed) entity.  I really just don't know.  Is it worth it?  Aside from me, would anyone really even care?  Do I truly care?  Maybe I just need to stop thinking and start writing.

0 nothingness

where did all the words go?
i feel empty--completely void of thought.
will they find me again?
i do miss them--the turmoil they wrung from me
is far better than this nothingness.

0 Quinzaine: Heat

#1
Sparks fly when I hear your voice.
Is it hate that flares
or passion?

#2
Your touch burns across my skin.
Can I survive it?
Can my heart?

1 Dancing Down a Storm: Blackout Poetry

Original text from Violet Eyes by Debbie Viguié (p.1)

A storm--
charged with intensity
of every terrible moment--
died,
when she danced.

1 Drowning in Words

I've taken time to breathe--
stilled my tapping fingers,
capped my quill's inkwell--
only to find myself suffocating.
Once spilled words finding an outlet
throughout my bloodstream
swimming against the current;
along my nerves
surfing the tsunami's swell;
within my lungs
filling the empty caverns,
squeezing every ounce of air out.
With each stunted breath,
my fingers itch to dispel this poison
my inkwell longs to unleash its fury
allowing the words to pour from me
before I drown.

1 the past... the future... another year...

Writing Unmasked
(image by rmp, that's me)

Today ...don't open...don't throw away... celebrates its two year anniversary.  This was a rough year for the blog...and me.  There were many moments when i though ...don't open...don't throw away... had run its course and i should let it go...let it fade into the "ether"-net where faint memories would drag people back wondering whatever happened to that blog.  Yet here I am...still holding on.  In comparison to my first year, this past year most definitely appears to be a stronger one--postings increased, followers increased, comments increased, categories increased, poetic form exploration increased.  Still in many respects it was much worst--I disbanded my rules, I went weeks without a single post, I went into hibernation...and I have truly not found my way back.

So lets take a closer look at this past year and maybe, just maybe, find a reason to continue...

The Rules...
Shortly after my one year anniversary, I reevaluated my rules and altered them.  I decided it was okay to allow my poetic self to shine a bit brighter--Rule (1) Must write at least three poems within a week (Sunday to Saturday).  I refused though to let myself slack on exploring my other two categories and even expanded them--Rule (2) Must write at least one post per week that falls into one of three categories:  pom seeds, prose and/or ramblings.  I also included a new rule (a category in and of itself)--Rule (5) Must include at least one image per week within a post. 

I think I made it about five months before I took a short break from ...don't open...don't throw away... and when I finally did return, I never really found my way back to the rules.  They currently remain on posted as "(Currently Inactive)." 

Now for some stats...

Posts...
This year, I have published 202 posts.  That is an increase of 12.2% from year one (fyo).  Of those posts, 161 were classified as poems (an 83.0% increase fyo), 10 were classified as prose (a 78.7% decrease fyo), 26 were classified as ramblings (a 50.0% decrease fyo), and 33 were classifed as pom seeds (new category).  For those of you totalling it all up, that does not equal to 202 for the simple fact that some post fell into multiple categories. 

Followers...
My follower base has increased from three to 23.  That would be a 666.7% increase.  Although technically one of my original three has left me...so in a way it is a 700% increase!  Of course it is important to note that these are the individuals who choose to follow open...there may be some (who like me) prefer to follow in hiding...  But to all of you who take the time to read my feeble attempts at poetry and prose or my inane ramblings, "Thank You!!"

Comments...
Having continued to expand my participation in different online communities (3WW, OneStopPoetry, Jingle Poetry, Poetic Asides, dVerse~Poets Pub...), I have found my comments have sky rocketed.  I recieved 791 comments this past year as apposed to last years 56.  That would equate to 1312.5% increase. 

My most commented on post:  silent scream (Like my fyo most commented on post, the majority of commentors came from 3WW.  I still thoroughly enjoy the challenge this site presents every week and truly did not realize how much so until I found my way back to it after my hibernation.  Plus I missed all of the talent writers with such an array of interesting uses of three simple (and sometimes tricky) words.)

Again, for all of you who take the time to leave a short (or long) note of appreciation or advice or opion or whatever..."Thank You!!"

Most Viewed...
I am still mystified by this poem...how its hits continue to growing...  Methods to Soothe Raging Emotions is definitely one of my favorites...so much so, that I actually have created an addtional three poems...while each unique in their structure, they follow the same theme.

Form Poetry...
I explored 16 new forms this year...created two of my own (Triquest & NAFF).  Of those, 41 poems posts were created (51 if you include my own forms).  I also continued to explore some of the original 16 forms.  If you include them, I posted 81 poem posts.  This does not equal the actual number of poems; one because some post may have contained more than one form and two because a post may have contained multiple poems of the form.

Pages...
Four new pages were added this year...joining the two fyo.  One explains the new category, pom seeds.  Two explain the structure and guidlines for my two forms. And one is a ballad that took me ten acts to write and way too much time, but was a hoot (and torture) to write.

Anyway...

I'm sure there are a lot more stats I could add, but we'll leave it here. 

So...with all that said and done...where is ...don't open...don't throw away... right now?  Where is ...don't open...don't throw away... heading?

Truth is I don't know.  I wish I did, but I don't.  I guess we'll just have to wait and see...

1 CRUSH

CRUSH

destroy

demolish

the resolution,

intent on transforming

small town life, squashed its spirit

"tear down the pure essence of hope."

---

the last Wednesday of the month meets the last Wednesday of the year...i wonder what the new year will bring...  this here clarity pyramid is for Three Word Wednesday [3WW=>demolish, resolution, transform(ing)].