My newest adventure is underway. It has lead me to take up residency in a new blog,
Like the Feathers of an Arrow (affectionately known as LFA).

...don't open...don't throw away... is not disappearing completely (not yet),
but postings here will be limited.

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

0 beyond the two brain theory

While the obsorbed-twin-two-brain theory has allowed me to put aside the insistent belief of a brain tumor, it also permitted me an opportunity to explain away my uniquely balanced brain.   According to an online quiz, I am 51% left brained...not a surprise when logical often runs my life.  Thus my right brain, the area considered the more creative and big picture side, holds 49% of my mental powers. 

I believe I was born more right brained and that the apparently more dominant left brain was developed as a coping mechanism.  I suffer from some emotional issues that produce some rather irrational thoughts, logics, and fears.  These issues can be traced back as early as second grade.  It seems to me that in order to cope, I needed to form some logical way to rationalize the irrational.  Order can be a great way to may the things you cannot control seem a bit easier to handle. 

If nature had been allowed to take its course free of my insanity, I think I most definitly would foster more right brain characteristics.  But maybe nature was looking out for me by helping me to develop the other half of my brain so thoroughly.  I am not sure I would (a) be alive or (b) be functioning outside of an insane asylum if not for my well balanced brain.

Unfortunately, when the irrational thoughts consume me, one of my best coping mechanisms is born in creativity.  I say unfortunately because often those sideways fears cause my logical brain to kick in to form some semblance of everything that creeps up on me.  And so I find myself frustrated and stunted, wanting more and not being able to truly grasp the part of me that so wishes to be heard.  Sometimes I wish I could shut off the left side of my brain and allow my right to set me free.

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