My newest adventure is underway. It has lead me to take up residency in a new blog,
Like the Feathers of an Arrow (affectionately known as LFA).

...don't open...don't throw away... is not disappearing completely (not yet),
but postings here will be limited.

Friday, January 18, 2013

9 CIHTD?: It Brings Me To My Knees

Title:  Over and Over
Artist:  O.A.R.  (of a revolution)
Album:  King
Genre:  Rock

Notes:  It is the following lines that captured my attention, though really the whole song spoke to me:

     Why do I draw these line 
     They keep me out of reach 
     It's not what I wanted, no 
     but it brings me to my knees

I've talked about building walls in the past (in a poem or two); the idea of drawing lines--boarders so to speak--seemed to hit the same chord for me.

It Brings Me To My Knees
Stuck--as one tire spins in the mud
the other does nothing--that's me
stepping on the gas and going no where;
I'm baked and caked in this crud
with no way of escaping this cell.
I itch to break free
scribble outside the lines
drawn by my own hand;
this is no way to be
stuck out of reach.
Lost--that pesky rabbit's turned the signs
this way and that--my sense of direction
no longer pointing due north leaving me
no where; I'm sitting on the sidelines
of my own life watching it pass me by.
My destination
eludes my grasp
so turned around
in frustration--
lost to my own self.
Falling--like Alice Through the Looking Glass
plunges down the hole--I seek
to find hold of something - anything -
the smallest bit of hope to blast
away the lines, to clear the path ahead
The sky is bleak
but somewhere
up ahead I know
the sun will peak
lighting my way.
At least that's what I tell myself, for I dare
not allow myself to live in utter despair
when I can fall to my knees in prayer.

An Aside:  The final stanza was suppose to be a couplet.  At first the last line was "not allow myself to fall to my knees in prayer."  But then I wasn't so sure about going there (with praying).  So I changed it to the current second line of the stanza.  It wasn't until I went back to write the note above that I thought the line "but it brings me too my knees" kind of fit the idea of prayer.  So I debated between the two for a bit before deciding (for now at least) to let them both stand.

An Form Aside:  With the exception of the final stanza, the above was an attempt at a Weave.  This form was introduced by its creator over at dVerse Poets Pub along with another form called Karousel.  To read more about either form and to check out some Karousels and Weaves from the talent dVerse pub-goers, stop on in for a pint or two of delicious verse.

A Final Aside:  My Cousin Vinny (stuck), Bugs Bunny (lost), and Alice in Wonderland (falling).  Quite honestly in my current frame of mind I can't even guarantee that the above poem makes sense, let alone explain how these three references made there way into this piece.  I don't really think this is where I had expected to end up when this song first struck a chord--I may even end up revisiting the song again once my head clears--but I've learned never to question inspiration.


  1. I love that you posted it the way you did. The "Weave" works well and I am thinking really "does" what David means it to do. It reads as free verse but it has that bit of repetition and rhyme that harkens a distant song. This rocks & rolls for me. I believe either of your choices on the last couplet work!

  2. You've used the weave form well - and then adapted it to your needs with your closing stanza. So much of what you have written in this poem speaks of the feeling of despair and depression, as experienced from the inside. I hope all is well with you.

  3. nice...i think you did really well with it...i also like the alternating longs line stanzas and then the short line...makes it like a song...def felt the emotions in it as well...

  4. i go driving in the desert with the bunnies and the tires getting stuck and going in circles. i know just how this feels both metaphorically and on the nose

    quantum kisses

  5. some tight images..sitting on the sidelines of life watching it pass by is the one that struck me the hop and courage in the closure and well done on the form as well

  6. I'm sitting on the sidelines
    of my own life watching it pass me by.

    ... powerful, sad... but the sun will peak, and prayer does help.

  7. For me this is a very relatable piece. I like the weave and I think your inspiration is right again--glad you didn't question, the references fit perfectly.

  8. I am very impressed with your weaved form as I only managed with two stanzas ~ Scribble outside the lines resonated with me ~ Great work ~

  9. beautiful and inspiring words. so many things have and still do bring me to my knees in prayer. you did a fine job with the form too.