Your Open Heart
If you have any hope of keeping me,
be on your guard should love begin to shape
for in my heart I'll be already packed.
So lock the door and throw away the key!
I have a tendency towards escape--
to throw up walls--for me to run and hide.
Be on your guard when love begins to shape;
for once within your heart I won't unpack--
when it comes down to sharing what's inside;
you need to realize this simple fact.
Just lock the door and throw away the key;
I have a tendency towards escape.
You need to realize this simple fact,
if you have any hope of keeping me.
So, after my post where I gave form with both meter and rhyme a go, I decided to keep the rhythm going. While this is not the same form (or technically any form for that matter though I have deemed it be called the Nota, formerly NAFF, 'cause I've written six poems now using this structure), it has a rhyming patter built in and I did my best to write in iambic pentameter. I don't intend to move away from meter or rhyme for at least one (maybe if I'm brave, two) more poem.
It seems yet again I have found inspiration from one of my Pom Seeds. I knew they'd come in handy!
This is my offerings for the dVerse Poets Pub OpenLinkNight. If you get a chance, check out all of the talented poets who have stepped up into the spotlight.
An (Audio) Aside: I'm extremely upset; the online application I use to record, store, and embed from is closing down its advanced features, which includes the audio. Now I have to work on finding an alternative. But it was an awesome application: easy to record, easy to edit, easy to add effects, easy to create a final product, easy to embed. And all of this in one place online and free. Very depressing.
nice...you capture a pretty cool rhythm...i also like the repetition in it...the tendency to escape, if one knows that need surely they can meet it...smiles...
ReplyDeleteI love hearing your voice...gives your words the emotional impact....the repetitive lines worked well...I like the locking of the door and throwing away the key ~
ReplyDeleteI like this. You really capture the fear of falling in love, yet the yearning for it.
ReplyDeleteI like the rhythm of this, and the love-at-arms-length thing is done well. Kiss me, but don't mean it, because that will scare me and get you hurt.
ReplyDeleteI like the way you bring this around and around with the same lines. The repetition works. After all, running away in relationships is a pattern for sure.
ReplyDelete