my heart aches constantly. my mind races non-stop. tears crest too often. none of this is new. i use to handle it better. it is getting harder. i am isolating myself, even from myself. how i manage to move beyond these walls is beyond me. how i manage to continue my routine is a mystery. i wish i possessed the ability to silence it all. the power to make my heart stop aching. the power to settle my racing mind. i should be out there enjoying myself and my life. i deserve that. why i fight it so, i canno fathom.
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